If toilet training and dehydration are a big problem in your family right now – as it is in ours – your hands may be full. And even the most relaxed parents among us sometimes go to our limits when it comes to this topic. Unnecessary stress and fear of failure can spread quickly to both sides. It’s time to get a new mindset and some great phrases that will relax and empower your child – no matter their age.
Dehydration is often an emotionally charged topic: some parents break into a sweat just thinking about it, while others just can’t wait for their child to finally stop wearing diapers.
Likewise, some babies strive for independence from an early age, while others take much longer to be ready to let go of the safety of a nappy. And both are fine! Because we know that baby dehydration is a natural process that does not require any help from our parents. It is based on individual physical development, which we can support and strengthen with our confidence.
What is a Montessori position?
Maria Montessori teachings symbolize treating children with respect and focusing on their individuality. It is appreciated by many teachers around the world because it promotes qualities such as self-determination, self-confidence, flexibility and good communication skills. What is good for our children also helps in comforting parents.
Because instead of claiming that we should be in control of everything, we can focus on supporting our children when they need us. This is why Montessori values are great for sobriety and all other aspects of parenting and help strengthen the bond between parent and child.
- Treat children with respect
- Promote freedom and independence
- individual promotion
- Support freedom with clear boundaries
- Give children time and space to explore and learn new things
- Follow the child: watch the steps of growth and interact with them instead of trying to achieve them
- Meet children as equal
- Use of adult language
- Vigilance: assume the role of observation in the first place
7 Montessori camels to dry
The following statements will help you encourage your child to take charge of his body. And they’ll help you change your mindset from “we have to do it somehow” to “I’m going to help you do it yourself.” Because Montessori does not mean “toilet training,” a term that literally means we have to train our child for something. It’s about learning to use potty as a tool for her normal development.
#1 “Your nappy is wet. Let’s put a new one on you!”
You can use this with your child before they are interested in potty training. Part of the Montessori idea is to strengthen children’s natural attachment to their body and their understanding of its functions. This works a little better with cloth nappies, but even with disposable diapers, babies learn very quickly when they’re full. Even your two- or three-year-old can get used to telling you when he’s wet or take it off yourself and have a new baby with you.
#2 “You are (already) so stable, we’ll wrap you up by standing up today.”
If we think about it, the convolution process is a very negative thing. Sure, you can help your baby and get diapers, wet wipes, and cream. Movements such as raising your pelvis to put in a diaper can also be incorporated with ease.
Once your baby can stand up well, you can also start changing him upright. In this way, he learns that he can actively participate in the process. At the same time, she has the opportunity to come for a nappy change on her own (which, of course, does not always work, but it is a great start).
And by experience: I started a little later, when I was two years old. But my kids have found changing diapers while standing is much better than having to “stand still” and wait while lying down. In addition, it is a great transition for more freedom.
#3 “Let’s go to the bathroom to get a diaper!”
One aspect of Montessori education is establishing a connection between the bathroom and going to the toilet at an early age. This can be perfectly combined with the point above: once you change your baby’s diaper while standing, you can go to the bathroom more often and can eg. B – Hold the edge of the bathtub. Or you can do it step by step and wrap z. B. Always before and after the shower, brush your teeth or go to bed in the bathroom.
#4 “You can wear underwear from now on.”
Here too, it may take a completely different amount of time before you or your child is ready to switch from underwear to undergarments (it’s very practical, especially when it’s cold!). With my first son, we waited for him to go to the potty regularly and then leave the nappies. Waterproof training pants are also great here, because not everything goes wrong right away, but your child will notice when he’s wet.
Second, he just started toilet training, but he’s been wearing underwear like his older brother (over nappies) for months now.
In any case, it will be easier for your child to get dressed and undressed if he does not have to work with the picks and can potty without getting in the way of the suit. So if you notice that your child is starting to care about the topic, you can start offering him underwear.
#5 “Would you like to sit on the potty?”
The decision to use the potty and when to use it is ultimately your child’s. In a Montessori education, it is important to get your consent rather than snatch it and rush it to the potty. And let her take the next step herself.
Many children are interested in the potty from the age of 1, so you are welcome to try it. But no matter how small or large it is: it is all about experience and experience, not result. If there is nothing in the potty, no problem at all. At some point your child will be ready without your help.
#6 “Your pants are wet. Let’s change you.”
“Accidents” can happen on the way to dehydration, and that’s totally normal! That’s why it’s a good idea to be careful not to trigger any negative feelings or feelings of shame when something falls on the pants/next to the potty/on the new couch – even if it can be stressful for us parents.
After all, it’s also a surprise – often unpleasant – for your children. Instead, be neutral and respectful and explain to your child how you handle the situation. Then the next time they already know what the next step is and can feel more secure.
#7 “I went to the bathroom like Mom and Dad!”
The Montessori style is more conservative when it comes to cheerful praise. This can quickly lead to stress, especially when it comes to toilet training, because our kids notice that we expect something specific from them. Of course, of course you can rejoice with your child if he is happy with the result in the potty.
However, you can focus on the fact that he has mastered the new routine rather than ending up at the destination or something in the pot at all. After all, the real goal is for him to learn to go to the toilet just like we adults do.
Dries without any pressure
Our body is a sensitive subject, especially when we question its normal development and react to it with emotions. Our children are good at keeping track of their bodies and accepting natural processes.
They know better when something changes and what they need from us next. Therefore, it may be better to trust them and let them lead the way rather than hope or criticize for quick progress. Because once we put pressure (even unconsciously and well-intentioned) on our children, we can make that development unnecessarily difficult for them. And even protracted problems can arise.
Because it goes well with drought and presents us with new challenges every day: Here are our tips for how to handle the tough phase.
What kind of mother are you or will you become?
Image source: Getty Images / romrodinka
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